Relationship Now, Baggage Later?

Q: I’ve been dating this guy for about three and a half months. I really really like him, but… I’ve been wondering how this relationship with him could be compromising my future marriage, and also my relationship with Christ. How influential emotionally do you think my bf will play in my life?

First, I want to tell you how awesome it is that you’re actually thinking about the consequences this relationship might have long-term. It shows a lot of maturity.

The fact that you’re asking this question shows that there is a seed of doubt in your heart about whether you should be in the relationship. If you’re wondering how the relationship you’re in now could be compromising your future marriage or your relationship with Christ, there must be something you see in the relationship that you know isn’t bringing God the most glory possible. I don’t know what that thing is, but the best advice I can give you is not to ignore it. If you sense God’s Spirit whispering that He wants your heart to be wholly His (that a relationship with your bf isn’t what He wants for you right now), don’t ignore Him! Remember, even though this guy you’re dating seems wonderful, God knows what’s best for you, so listen to Him.

How influential will your current bf be in your life? I really can’t answer that for you, but I can tell you that I still feel the emotional consequences of just about every relationship I’ve ever had, whether it lasted a few weeks or a few years. That’s definitely something to consider! You can see more of my thoughts on dating here.

I hope that helps, sis. Whatever you do, keep seeking God’s will for your life, even when it’s hard to accept what you know He’s telling you. That’s the only way to live life without regrets!


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Welcome to Life, Love and God—a place for teen girls to find answers! I’m Jessie. Consider me a spiritual “big sis”—someone who cares a ton for you and wants to help you thrive!