Miss Contentment

Q: Nearly all of my friends are in a relationship and keep telling me that I should be in one too. But I’m 15 and really enjoy being single. My friends like to bring me along on their dates as a fifth wheel, but I feel really awkward. I’ve told them how I feel about dating right now, but they don’t listen. What should I tell them/do?

adropFirst of all, let me give you a huge fist-bump for being one of the few teens in this world who is content to NOT be in a relationship! It’s so refreshing to hear about someone like you who recognizes that there are a lot of really cool things about being single, and there’s no hurry to find “the one” when you’re 15 (or 16, or 17… or even 18!). But I totally get that even “success” brings about its own set of challenges, right? You have a frame of mind that others need to have, but when your own friends don’t “get it,” whew! It can be hard not to get frustrated, and especially hard not to start wondering if something’s wrong with you. I don’t have any grand words of wisdom to pass along in this area, but I think maybe what you need most is just a good, ol’ fashioned pep talk! So here I am, shouting virtually over the e-waves, “Stay strong, girl!” Your friends don’t realize it yet, but you’re saving yourself so much heartache and regret by staying single in high school. I promise you this: You will never look back and regret not having a boyfriend. But if you get into a relationship for the wrong reasons or at the wrong time, you will definitely regret it later. I have a feeling that your friends will get it in time. When they watch you continue to be content NOT being in a relationship when they have broken heart after broken heart, eventually they might come to you and ask you for advice! But even if they never understand, it’s better for you to be misunderstood than compromise what you believe is right.

Before I go, here’s a passage from Isaiah (The Message paraphrase) that might encourage you:

The path of right-living people is level. The Leveler evens the road for the right-living. We’re in no hurry, God. We’re content to linger in the path sign-posted with your decisions. Who you are and what you’ve done are all we’ll ever want. Through the night my soul longs for you. Deep from within me my spirit reaches out to you. (Isaiah 26:7-9)

I love that sentence, “Who You are and what You’ve done are all we’ll ever want”! God is enough for you, sis. You don’t need a guy to fill your soul. You can be content to take your time through the path of life, waiting for the time God has decided is right for “Mr. Right” to come along. In the meantime, my prayer is that you’ll take time to stop and smell the roses!


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Welcome to Life, Love and God—a place for teen girls to find answers! I’m Jessie. Consider me a spiritual “big sis”—someone who cares a ton for you and wants to help you thrive!